Here i am, awake at such an unearthly hour; 5.38am on a Sunday morning. that said, i am feeling sleepy all of a sudden. i'll probably just crawl back to bed and have another good night rest.
my exams, in another 3 weeks time and still counting down. i am really freaking out but i just don't have the time to blog. i'm hardly on facebook and i missed my animes too. sigh. i want to study hard and score well for exams. i really want but i really don't know if i really did study every god damn thing that i need to study.
i feel so guilty spending my time here blogging and nua-ing some where in the house. it feels like i have simply wasted my precious time.
come on. just 3 weeks. focus.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Letter
Dear Girl,
I have no idea what had happened in Aussie with that boy, but i hope that you would be alright and everything will be fine. I will and I am looking forward to seeing you again when you comes back in November, and we will have all our fun :) This I promise to you! Ice Skating, Wild Wild Wet and maybe Universal Studio and whatever crazy things we both can do together. So for now, don't be sad.
I know it is gonna be hard, but that's there is to it. You have already been through the worst, so what is all this now?! No worries, you will get over this and be all yourself again. That cheerful and funny girl whom I have always known. Be happy. You deserve that much for yourself, girl. You had enough. It is time.
It is inevitable that you would be heart broken and all your scars would be open up. I also know that you will not be the kind of girl who would do whatever it takes to grab that boy by force. Because everything is just going to be temporary and since you have been in that other person's shoes before, you knew even better, how much it hurts for all parties.
Deep down, somewhere in your heart, I believed that you already knew right from the start that this whole thing ain't gonna work out rght. There will be temptation and that boy, is the main distraction of all. He would make you reconsider your decisions and will do anything to keep you by his side, at least for now. But,when he does all this, you too, know that when the time comes, he would gently put you aside and return back to where she is and coax her the way he did to you.
It's normal to feel jealous since we are all human. We have emotions and feelings. Girl, something we learnt from bowling; emotions control motion. So Girl, if you can control you emotions better, you would be able to make better decisions and do the things that you THINK it is right. Knowing you, would have considered her feelings into the equation and come out with the answer. It's alright.
Time. The best medicine ever for your broken heart. Girl, don't rush to heal your wound. It really takes time to get use to being alone again, doing the things that you used to do before the boy steps in. Life is going to feel boring once again, but at the same time, you would discover so many other things that you've once never thought of it before.
I don't have a recipe for your broken heart. I don't have any magic spells to help you forget your memories. Neither do I have any medicine to make things any better for you. The only thing I can give is advice and support. It is all up to you on how you want to end things with the boy. It is the path that you choose.
Seriously, if things cannot be the way you want it to be, then being friends would always be a better option. If you were to ask me, I would rather not be friends at all. Since you have been hurt, there is no point in staying around him and remind you of all the things you try not to remember. It is difficult to put up a facade to be friends and pretent that nothing happened and continue to smile. If you ask me, I can't do that. We are human Girl, there is no way you could ever do that in an instant. If it's over a long long time, then that makes perfect sense. But not now.
Be strong. Smile. Stay happy. Take care and be confident.
It is always better to walk away with grace.
The least you could salvage is your pride and dignity.
Regards,
Loves :)
I have no idea what had happened in Aussie with that boy, but i hope that you would be alright and everything will be fine. I will and I am looking forward to seeing you again when you comes back in November, and we will have all our fun :) This I promise to you! Ice Skating, Wild Wild Wet and maybe Universal Studio and whatever crazy things we both can do together. So for now, don't be sad.
I know it is gonna be hard, but that's there is to it. You have already been through the worst, so what is all this now?! No worries, you will get over this and be all yourself again. That cheerful and funny girl whom I have always known. Be happy. You deserve that much for yourself, girl. You had enough. It is time.
It is inevitable that you would be heart broken and all your scars would be open up. I also know that you will not be the kind of girl who would do whatever it takes to grab that boy by force. Because everything is just going to be temporary and since you have been in that other person's shoes before, you knew even better, how much it hurts for all parties.
Deep down, somewhere in your heart, I believed that you already knew right from the start that this whole thing ain't gonna work out rght. There will be temptation and that boy, is the main distraction of all. He would make you reconsider your decisions and will do anything to keep you by his side, at least for now. But,when he does all this, you too, know that when the time comes, he would gently put you aside and return back to where she is and coax her the way he did to you.
It's normal to feel jealous since we are all human. We have emotions and feelings. Girl, something we learnt from bowling; emotions control motion. So Girl, if you can control you emotions better, you would be able to make better decisions and do the things that you THINK it is right. Knowing you, would have considered her feelings into the equation and come out with the answer. It's alright.
Time. The best medicine ever for your broken heart. Girl, don't rush to heal your wound. It really takes time to get use to being alone again, doing the things that you used to do before the boy steps in. Life is going to feel boring once again, but at the same time, you would discover so many other things that you've once never thought of it before.
I don't have a recipe for your broken heart. I don't have any magic spells to help you forget your memories. Neither do I have any medicine to make things any better for you. The only thing I can give is advice and support. It is all up to you on how you want to end things with the boy. It is the path that you choose.
Seriously, if things cannot be the way you want it to be, then being friends would always be a better option. If you were to ask me, I would rather not be friends at all. Since you have been hurt, there is no point in staying around him and remind you of all the things you try not to remember. It is difficult to put up a facade to be friends and pretent that nothing happened and continue to smile. If you ask me, I can't do that. We are human Girl, there is no way you could ever do that in an instant. If it's over a long long time, then that makes perfect sense. But not now.
Be strong. Smile. Stay happy. Take care and be confident.
It is always better to walk away with grace.
The least you could salvage is your pride and dignity.
Regards,
Loves :)
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
After so many years....
to be real honest, i am not feeling extremely well recently. not in the mental aspect since i'm perfectly healthy, it's on the emotional aspects. i am disturbed by so many things happening around me. like so many things.
many a times, when ever i overheard the girl, or any one of my friends complaining about their parents being so difficult here and there, and i always, without a fail, will encorage them to look on the bright side of it and try not to pick a fight or quarell with their dad or mom. just because i have many friends out there who has lost their parents to accidents, illness and some in the event of a divorced. and so, i always appreciate how fortunate i am to have both my dad and my mom with me. i really really really do. that said, they still get on my nerves some times. and that is frustrating to know.
SHE has always pick on every single thing that i do since young but also at the same time showered me with unlimited amount of love and concern. i know how she always stick up for me and stand by my side.i know it all. things got worst, when i entered the bowling arena. she's harder on me than anyone in the family. pushes me to my max and only when things start to collapse, she learnt to let it go. *although suicide did come into my mind several times, but i dont have the guts to do so* and so many times in my life, i always wonder, would it be better if i'm dead? i guess she would probably be sad, but after a while she would be all happy that i'm gone. that's what she said before, although i did bring it up to her and she deny saying that before. what can i say boy.
from young, i have developed this habit of not saying "no" to her. because i simply know what kind of consequences i will exepect after that. after a few tries, i gave up just because i was too tired to have an argument with her. i never win. and even if i did, she was the one who gave in, not because i really won. so i don't see a point. but having that said, there were times that her disapproval does make a point and save my ass from lots of trouble. so that i can appreciate. however there are still so many things in my life, even after i'm 21, she still rules it over me. but, i can tolerate it. no problem. just have to let it slide.
and so, from time to time, i am always thinking about ways and solutions to live peacefully with her. no fights. no arguments. at least throughout the year and the only conclusion i have is that i must have my own earning power and to not spend so much time at home alone, together with her. and from the past 2 years of my life, i have proven myself right. HE who spends more time with her for the past 2 years on my behalf since i'm always not around, has been into more arguments and fights with her more than i did. awesome isn't it? i found a scapegoat. *i really hate to put it this way, but that's the reality and it's cruel*
sigh. i resigned from my job some time around in feb this year and till now it's only 2 months and i have been ALMOST into an argument with her TWICE. can you imagine, it's only 2 months of me spending more time at home and i almost had 2 arguments with her?! i cannot imagine how to survive for the next 8 months of my life. i regretted quitting from my job. seriously i did. i'm now begging to god that some one just employ me now, in an instant. thank goodness i took up the internship offered by my school for 2 months starting in june. so from now till then, i will just use study as an excuse to leave house and not to be home. pathetic am i? i have a house i cannot go back to until nightfalls. what a shame.
honestly, i have no idea whether is she picking a fight with me on purpose. at first, she was all happy about this boy i just knew and is always cheerful when i'm out with him, however after she found out that he smokes, she became all wary and upset whenever i'm with him. for now, i can still take her attitude as long as she doesnt jumps over the line like what she did with the previous friends of mine, i'm fine. i can take that. next, she is still comparing me to this another bowler saying that i can NEVER EVER win her in my whole life and that i suck as a bowler since i have been bowling for god damn long and still cannot overtake her. THIS, i can take it. no problem. it's true that i'm a lousy bowler, but as long as i know where i stand, i'm fine with it. i don't need her encouragement, her approval, her consent or her support in my bowling. i have already learnt to live without all that. i'm fine.
NOW, she nags on my passion i love most which is also bowling. i participated in this league organized by this friend of mine, it's a weekly thing and each time i'm selected to bowl, i would have to pay $16 for 4 games. that is reasonable. every where else charges the same. my team is not strong, but i'm just bowling for training and for my friends. and this is what she said :"don't spend so much money on this useless, cannot win game. $16 is not cheap and if you cannot win is like throwing money into the sea. we are tight with cash now and please try to save money since daddy is working hard to earn money. be more sensible a bit. you so old already. now every thing is so expensive!" guess what, you don't know how much blood has rushed into my brain and i feel like telling her that if she ever worried about money, she shouldnt be spending OUR money on jackpots. i'm fine with her playing mahjong since it's a luck thing and you are playing against humn. i'm fine with 4d because she always did her homework before betting. but JACKPOT?!?! you've got to be kidding me. and she lost from at least $150 to $'000 of dollars. and WHAT IS MY $16 COMPARED TO THAT?!?!?! not to mention that she frequents the jackpot room almost vey night for god knows how many years since I WAS YOUNG. seriously, i wonder if she ever knows what she's saying. half of the time, i know she KNEW what she's talking about. she just want to pick a fight on me.
if i were younger then, i would have shoot her with it and i forget about sleeping tonight. but now, i just need to blast my ipod and pretend not to hear a single nonsense she has spoken. it just makes my blood boils. fine. i can take it. no problem at all. i can take it all. if my dad can, i could too. i will make it through for this 2 months until my internship starts. and after that i'd better start my job hunting. i cannot stand staying at home, being together with her alone for long hours. it's torturing. i'd rather work till i drop dead. at least i know my efforts pay off.
i'm so pissed now. i really wish i could do something else now to distract myself from her. and i have decided that from tomorrow onwards, whether i can find anybody to study with me, i am going to do my self study anywhere but home. even my house downstairs i'm fine with it. and, i am not going to bother or ask my dad to pick me up or send me home. i have enough of her grumbling about the waiting time. even if i have to crawl, i'll crawl home. cash. is something i dont have since i dont save and i always give my allowance to my parents. but, somehow i will manage it until i get a job. this year. so it's only a few more months to bear. i know i can pull through.no problem.
i really want work.
many a times, when ever i overheard the girl, or any one of my friends complaining about their parents being so difficult here and there, and i always, without a fail, will encorage them to look on the bright side of it and try not to pick a fight or quarell with their dad or mom. just because i have many friends out there who has lost their parents to accidents, illness and some in the event of a divorced. and so, i always appreciate how fortunate i am to have both my dad and my mom with me. i really really really do. that said, they still get on my nerves some times. and that is frustrating to know.
SHE has always pick on every single thing that i do since young but also at the same time showered me with unlimited amount of love and concern. i know how she always stick up for me and stand by my side.i know it all. things got worst, when i entered the bowling arena. she's harder on me than anyone in the family. pushes me to my max and only when things start to collapse, she learnt to let it go. *although suicide did come into my mind several times, but i dont have the guts to do so* and so many times in my life, i always wonder, would it be better if i'm dead? i guess she would probably be sad, but after a while she would be all happy that i'm gone. that's what she said before, although i did bring it up to her and she deny saying that before. what can i say boy.
from young, i have developed this habit of not saying "no" to her. because i simply know what kind of consequences i will exepect after that. after a few tries, i gave up just because i was too tired to have an argument with her. i never win. and even if i did, she was the one who gave in, not because i really won. so i don't see a point. but having that said, there were times that her disapproval does make a point and save my ass from lots of trouble. so that i can appreciate. however there are still so many things in my life, even after i'm 21, she still rules it over me. but, i can tolerate it. no problem. just have to let it slide.
and so, from time to time, i am always thinking about ways and solutions to live peacefully with her. no fights. no arguments. at least throughout the year and the only conclusion i have is that i must have my own earning power and to not spend so much time at home alone, together with her. and from the past 2 years of my life, i have proven myself right. HE who spends more time with her for the past 2 years on my behalf since i'm always not around, has been into more arguments and fights with her more than i did. awesome isn't it? i found a scapegoat. *i really hate to put it this way, but that's the reality and it's cruel*
sigh. i resigned from my job some time around in feb this year and till now it's only 2 months and i have been ALMOST into an argument with her TWICE. can you imagine, it's only 2 months of me spending more time at home and i almost had 2 arguments with her?! i cannot imagine how to survive for the next 8 months of my life. i regretted quitting from my job. seriously i did. i'm now begging to god that some one just employ me now, in an instant. thank goodness i took up the internship offered by my school for 2 months starting in june. so from now till then, i will just use study as an excuse to leave house and not to be home. pathetic am i? i have a house i cannot go back to until nightfalls. what a shame.
honestly, i have no idea whether is she picking a fight with me on purpose. at first, she was all happy about this boy i just knew and is always cheerful when i'm out with him, however after she found out that he smokes, she became all wary and upset whenever i'm with him. for now, i can still take her attitude as long as she doesnt jumps over the line like what she did with the previous friends of mine, i'm fine. i can take that. next, she is still comparing me to this another bowler saying that i can NEVER EVER win her in my whole life and that i suck as a bowler since i have been bowling for god damn long and still cannot overtake her. THIS, i can take it. no problem. it's true that i'm a lousy bowler, but as long as i know where i stand, i'm fine with it. i don't need her encouragement, her approval, her consent or her support in my bowling. i have already learnt to live without all that. i'm fine.
NOW, she nags on my passion i love most which is also bowling. i participated in this league organized by this friend of mine, it's a weekly thing and each time i'm selected to bowl, i would have to pay $16 for 4 games. that is reasonable. every where else charges the same. my team is not strong, but i'm just bowling for training and for my friends. and this is what she said :"don't spend so much money on this useless, cannot win game. $16 is not cheap and if you cannot win is like throwing money into the sea. we are tight with cash now and please try to save money since daddy is working hard to earn money. be more sensible a bit. you so old already. now every thing is so expensive!" guess what, you don't know how much blood has rushed into my brain and i feel like telling her that if she ever worried about money, she shouldnt be spending OUR money on jackpots. i'm fine with her playing mahjong since it's a luck thing and you are playing against humn. i'm fine with 4d because she always did her homework before betting. but JACKPOT?!?! you've got to be kidding me. and she lost from at least $150 to $'000 of dollars. and WHAT IS MY $16 COMPARED TO THAT?!?!?! not to mention that she frequents the jackpot room almost vey night for god knows how many years since I WAS YOUNG. seriously, i wonder if she ever knows what she's saying. half of the time, i know she KNEW what she's talking about. she just want to pick a fight on me.
if i were younger then, i would have shoot her with it and i forget about sleeping tonight. but now, i just need to blast my ipod and pretend not to hear a single nonsense she has spoken. it just makes my blood boils. fine. i can take it. no problem at all. i can take it all. if my dad can, i could too. i will make it through for this 2 months until my internship starts. and after that i'd better start my job hunting. i cannot stand staying at home, being together with her alone for long hours. it's torturing. i'd rather work till i drop dead. at least i know my efforts pay off.
i'm so pissed now. i really wish i could do something else now to distract myself from her. and i have decided that from tomorrow onwards, whether i can find anybody to study with me, i am going to do my self study anywhere but home. even my house downstairs i'm fine with it. and, i am not going to bother or ask my dad to pick me up or send me home. i have enough of her grumbling about the waiting time. even if i have to crawl, i'll crawl home. cash. is something i dont have since i dont save and i always give my allowance to my parents. but, somehow i will manage it until i get a job. this year. so it's only a few more months to bear. i know i can pull through.no problem.
i really want work.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Emotions
Checked up on this girl and felt that she is not doing well at all. Something is bothering her and she seems to have some difficulty dealing with it. Girl, as long as you have made up your mind, dont regret it. life is simple, we make decisions and we dont look back. everything's gonna be alright. we're not perfect and that's perfectly normal. smile girl.
It is not wrong to want to feel wanted by someone important to you. it is our very human nature that made us to feel this way. checking on phone for messages and calls, missing him every now and then, and wishing that he was there with you... all these are normal. it is not because you're weak, dependent or stupid. is what any girl would have done. when they are in love.
It is definitely not too much to ask for a boy who would feels that you matters most in his life. this is the very basic requirement you can ever ask from a boy. and if he can't deliver that, he's not worth for you at all and that's because he doesn't love you much. Boys, will argue that each and every one of them has their own ways in expressing their love for the girl they like. but if you ever notice, at the end of the day, there are always a FEW THINGS that any boy would only do for the girl he really loves and wants to be with for as long as time permits. take your parents for example. there is a reason why with all the arguments and quarrells, they are still married to each other and not divorced.
You will be able to tell apart from those boys who are out to play and from those who seriously wants a life with you. and i know that, you probably knew that it is not quite possible for him to leave her after knowing so much about them. and this, is normal too. if he really can put her aside, he would have already done so long ago. no need to drag till now. their history is undeniable and for whatever reasons he may give, the fact that he has stayed with her for 4years proves that he has feelings for her. be it love or for atonement. he has it. and the truth is, he cant let it go.
truth hurts. it always does. but it brings you back to reality. lies on the other hand is like a delusion. a weak bubble to put around you that will burst easily. also, the most important in life is to be honest with yourself. what is it that you want? work towards your goals. if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, i can always lend you mine :) friends are there for a reason. so you're fighting alone at all.
stand tall. brace yourself. take a deep breath, and chest up! walk away confidently. show him that you are better off without him. happier and you can definitely move on and will take a big step at a time. this will pains your heart no doubt, but time as the best healing medicine ever, will numb it for you. widen your eyes, broaden your scope, find a better man. there is no need for you to cry to sleep anymore. you can do it because you are not alone.
Girl, you are stronger than you think you are. believe that since i am the one who said it. have faith and confidence.
tell him. that this love game is over. you are through and through with him. lay down your rules. be firm and that you know that it is the right thing to do. tell him. that he can have his ego all to himself. that you no need to be in his arms anymore. the tears you've cried, are no longer for him.
you did not lose him. is he who has lost you.
walk away, girl.
walk away with pride and dignity.
you deserve that much.
everything will be fine :) it's ok, you don't have to be afriad. the worst will be over soon.
It is not wrong to want to feel wanted by someone important to you. it is our very human nature that made us to feel this way. checking on phone for messages and calls, missing him every now and then, and wishing that he was there with you... all these are normal. it is not because you're weak, dependent or stupid. is what any girl would have done. when they are in love.
It is definitely not too much to ask for a boy who would feels that you matters most in his life. this is the very basic requirement you can ever ask from a boy. and if he can't deliver that, he's not worth for you at all and that's because he doesn't love you much. Boys, will argue that each and every one of them has their own ways in expressing their love for the girl they like. but if you ever notice, at the end of the day, there are always a FEW THINGS that any boy would only do for the girl he really loves and wants to be with for as long as time permits. take your parents for example. there is a reason why with all the arguments and quarrells, they are still married to each other and not divorced.
You will be able to tell apart from those boys who are out to play and from those who seriously wants a life with you. and i know that, you probably knew that it is not quite possible for him to leave her after knowing so much about them. and this, is normal too. if he really can put her aside, he would have already done so long ago. no need to drag till now. their history is undeniable and for whatever reasons he may give, the fact that he has stayed with her for 4years proves that he has feelings for her. be it love or for atonement. he has it. and the truth is, he cant let it go.
truth hurts. it always does. but it brings you back to reality. lies on the other hand is like a delusion. a weak bubble to put around you that will burst easily. also, the most important in life is to be honest with yourself. what is it that you want? work towards your goals. if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, i can always lend you mine :) friends are there for a reason. so you're fighting alone at all.
stand tall. brace yourself. take a deep breath, and chest up! walk away confidently. show him that you are better off without him. happier and you can definitely move on and will take a big step at a time. this will pains your heart no doubt, but time as the best healing medicine ever, will numb it for you. widen your eyes, broaden your scope, find a better man. there is no need for you to cry to sleep anymore. you can do it because you are not alone.
Girl, you are stronger than you think you are. believe that since i am the one who said it. have faith and confidence.
tell him. that this love game is over. you are through and through with him. lay down your rules. be firm and that you know that it is the right thing to do. tell him. that he can have his ego all to himself. that you no need to be in his arms anymore. the tears you've cried, are no longer for him.
you did not lose him. is he who has lost you.
walk away, girl.
walk away with pride and dignity.
you deserve that much.
everything will be fine :) it's ok, you don't have to be afriad. the worst will be over soon.
Dead Tired
24hrs bowling is total madness and i survived. yes, survived it all. i have no idea how i could manage to pull through without a wink of sleep in between and i was constantly hungry. my left arm aches because of holding my heavy bowling ball while getting ready to bowl, right forearm ache because of wii the day before and of course, bowling for 14games. my left tigh aches because of my balancing, my right hemstring hurts because of my power step. conclusion is: bowling is taking a toll on my body.
of course, a sequence of events have contributed to my aches such as roller blading on wednesday, ice skating on thursday and playing wii and mahjong on friday. do not underestimate the power of wii. my arm aches because of that. we played rrr1 and rrr2. we're gonna conquer rrr3 the next round. although we may look stupid, again.
although bowling is tiring, it's fun and of course the company of friends made it possible for me to deal with it. with constant cheering, laughter and jokes, we are always on the ball. we came in fifth out of all the strong teams out there. it is hard to name it all so i would just name the main characters on the team, the first was jennifer's team, second bronscon's team, third uncle jack's team, fourth patrick phua's team and mine on the fifth. so, it is an awesome team that we came in 5th out of 30 teams.
we bowled 48 games for qualifying. from 9am to 4pm. fast ain't we? then 72 games from 9pm to 8am. in between from 4pm to 9pm, we played l4d2, eat dinner, gelare ice cream and talk cock. as for me, i read my twiling book. edward is still as charming as he is. how i wish my boyfriend is him. anyway, end of report, off tagging photos on fb. ttyl.
of course, a sequence of events have contributed to my aches such as roller blading on wednesday, ice skating on thursday and playing wii and mahjong on friday. do not underestimate the power of wii. my arm aches because of that. we played rrr1 and rrr2. we're gonna conquer rrr3 the next round. although we may look stupid, again.
although bowling is tiring, it's fun and of course the company of friends made it possible for me to deal with it. with constant cheering, laughter and jokes, we are always on the ball. we came in fifth out of all the strong teams out there. it is hard to name it all so i would just name the main characters on the team, the first was jennifer's team, second bronscon's team, third uncle jack's team, fourth patrick phua's team and mine on the fifth. so, it is an awesome team that we came in 5th out of 30 teams.
we bowled 48 games for qualifying. from 9am to 4pm. fast ain't we? then 72 games from 9pm to 8am. in between from 4pm to 9pm, we played l4d2, eat dinner, gelare ice cream and talk cock. as for me, i read my twiling book. edward is still as charming as he is. how i wish my boyfriend is him. anyway, end of report, off tagging photos on fb. ttyl.
Friday, April 2, 2010
The Impossibles
Finally after 23 years of my life, i've stepped into an ice skating ring and ice skate with Foo and Sim. Awesome friends i have. Sim as pro as she's roller blades, get the hang of skating pretty fast. as for me and foo, we took a while but gradually we are able to skate across the ring and we now know, how fun ice skating can be :) Tham, i will definitely bring u along with me next time and we will make it fun too...
This little girl called me from so far away from our homeland. at first i thought it was some stupid china agencies calling me so i hung up on you, sorry girl, i don't mean it. i'm glad u called. at least u had someone to talk to, i may be busy, but please remember, i will always be there for you because i know how hard it can be to be fighting alone this seemingly long and tiring battle. what can i say? i'm in a similiar situation, but i think i can handle it, alright. don't worry dear, you have my back!
Girl, sometimes learning to give up is not a bad thing. in order to gain something new, we have to let go of something old. like i've said, love can sometimes be like magic, and magic can sometimes be illusional. there's no doubt that you will be heartbroken and all your wounds will open up. but that's part and parcel of this whole damn thing. and that is exactly what makes us stronger. just like you, i'm tired of this whole thing as well. what can i say? it is a battle not worth fighting for. it is high risk and low/no returns.
Having said all that, running away is definitely not the best solution. facing it is hard, but if that's where u fell, you would need to pick yourself up from there. problems are bound to happen, and we need to know how to deal with it, so we can prevent it the next time. saying is easier than getting it done. girl, i know this better than anyone. but it's not impossible as long as you tell yourself so. positive thinking is what set everything on the move. try to understand more about him, before u pass your judgement on this relationship. words, may seem to be what it is, but trust me, the power words have, is undeniable. when things are spoken, you feel so much better.
I seriously don't like the way he treats you. it is like he is having all the joy to himself and you girls have to fight over him and he, sitting on the sideline, enjoying this drama. look, if he has already made up his mind on you, put it into action. if not, it is the same as playing around. and girl, if he is doing that, i think you deserve some one better. you don't need to go through this for him. he may be one of the good catch, but good on the outside won't last long, it is what is in the inside that makes it worthwhile. of course, the looks play a somewhat important part in the evaluation process :)
So girl, think about it. if this is really taking a toll on you, why not just let it go. you may be surprised that you will find it easier to breathe after letting it go. it starts with your mind. if you want a change, everything starts with you. i'll always be here. love you always.
This little girl called me from so far away from our homeland. at first i thought it was some stupid china agencies calling me so i hung up on you, sorry girl, i don't mean it. i'm glad u called. at least u had someone to talk to, i may be busy, but please remember, i will always be there for you because i know how hard it can be to be fighting alone this seemingly long and tiring battle. what can i say? i'm in a similiar situation, but i think i can handle it, alright. don't worry dear, you have my back!
Girl, sometimes learning to give up is not a bad thing. in order to gain something new, we have to let go of something old. like i've said, love can sometimes be like magic, and magic can sometimes be illusional. there's no doubt that you will be heartbroken and all your wounds will open up. but that's part and parcel of this whole damn thing. and that is exactly what makes us stronger. just like you, i'm tired of this whole thing as well. what can i say? it is a battle not worth fighting for. it is high risk and low/no returns.
Having said all that, running away is definitely not the best solution. facing it is hard, but if that's where u fell, you would need to pick yourself up from there. problems are bound to happen, and we need to know how to deal with it, so we can prevent it the next time. saying is easier than getting it done. girl, i know this better than anyone. but it's not impossible as long as you tell yourself so. positive thinking is what set everything on the move. try to understand more about him, before u pass your judgement on this relationship. words, may seem to be what it is, but trust me, the power words have, is undeniable. when things are spoken, you feel so much better.
I seriously don't like the way he treats you. it is like he is having all the joy to himself and you girls have to fight over him and he, sitting on the sideline, enjoying this drama. look, if he has already made up his mind on you, put it into action. if not, it is the same as playing around. and girl, if he is doing that, i think you deserve some one better. you don't need to go through this for him. he may be one of the good catch, but good on the outside won't last long, it is what is in the inside that makes it worthwhile. of course, the looks play a somewhat important part in the evaluation process :)
So girl, think about it. if this is really taking a toll on you, why not just let it go. you may be surprised that you will find it easier to breathe after letting it go. it starts with your mind. if you want a change, everything starts with you. i'll always be here. love you always.
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