Moments

Started work today and realized that i am still in my holiday mood. Entering the new year would means more work to do and more obstacles to face. Oh well, guess i will have to deal with it and make the best out of everything. Besides, i know what i'm worth and capable for and will continue believing in myself like i've always did.

Was reading through my friends' blog and came to realise that whatever they are going through right now was something i've experienced before couple of years ago. Speaking about failing in bowling, getting back on your feet, loving my family and all my friends, walking through thick and thin with my family, talking about financial difficulties and many other things which i've already been through and overcome them over the years. I am not here to compare who suffered harder but this just reminds me that everyone of us will go through this phase of life and it is just a matter of who faces it first. I've seen many who failed and was not able to get back on their feet. I've also seen many who fought hard and had found their worth. There are also a handful who are really blessed and manage to escape all the way through.

I remembered once i've shared my experiences with one of the lecturers when I was in Temasek Poly. I told him about how lucky i was to have meet many great people during my school days who have helped me unconditionally and also fabulous teachers who have shown me guidiance in many aspects. I have met great people who has made a difference in my life and that what makes me who i am today. During my poly days, i have friends who stood by me whenever i'm feeling down or despair and my parents who has given me constant support and encouragement has helped me through many difficult phases of my life. And now that i am in university, i ought to learn to be independent and self-reliant.

Took up a job to earn my own expenses, studied harder so that i will not let my parent down and try to bowl better to win more tournaments to prove that i deserve to be in the team and if i were to leave one day, it is not because the federation does want me and is because i don't need them anymore.

I guess my new year resolution for this year will probably be: work hard to earn my experience in the working world and try to at least score for a Bs than a Cs for my studies. Also, since my days are already numbered in the squad i will make the best out of everything i could to prove my final worth and leave with pride. Try not to defy my parents too much and be a better girl. Do a little self-reflection to see what i'm lacking and what the areas i need to improve.

Oh well, there are just too many things i want to do for this year...better write it down in my planner. I really need to do some self-reflection...