I have been inactive online for quite some time and that is because i am enjoying to my heart's content my 2 weeks holiday before i start work again this monday. Read the girl's blog and somehow it seems to me that she is facing another problem. Girl, i'm sure that you have noticed this yourself but it seems that you always happen to be at the extreme ends of this relationship. either you're always too happy and cheerful to the point that you would probably marry him or too distracted and frustrated to the point of cutting him off from your life forever.
Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must prepared for changes. Girl, this whole thing is taking a toll on you and perhaps it is really time to put a stop to it before it gets you deeper and then you will feel even more lost than usual. and because things are the way they are, things will not stay the way they are. and you will need to take the first step to make a change so that you could move on with your life.
You will be surprise with how much human can adapt to the changes in the surrounding with the help of time. it's a habit to have the boy around you, its not lonely with the boy around you and you have adapted to it because the boy is around you. WAIT! stop and think, you did have your share of fun now, but you also had your share of laughter in the past when that boy was not around.
Managing a relationship is not easy but it's not supposed to be that tough too. I know you're feeling guilty and all, and all along you are aware of that but at the same time, you are trying to shove that thought deep down somewhere in your memory each time you are with the boy, with every assurance he can give you. but you know, at the end of the day, that boy, whom you have given everything to him, did not choose definitely to be with you.
Women as we are, are easily fooled by sweet words, empty promises, obvious lies and irresistible body gestures. One word can ease your doubts, one promises can give you happiness that would last for a lifetime and one hug could sweep away all your saddness. However, if those are not true, the setback will be harder to bear. and women as we are, we always accept it and hope that time would heal those wounds. That is very silly.
Fairytales does not exist but happiness is something we fight to achieve. The definition defers from individuals so Girl, know what makes you happy the most. not those sweet moments of pretend from that boy but the genuine moments of happiness where you could really feel that he cares. Trust me, you deserve better than this. have a little more faith in yourself.
Love is a smoke made with fume of sighs. it can be magical at times, but magic itself is an illusion.
Know what's best for yourself. Be not afriad to try and fail. Be afriad of failing to try :)
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Dance In The Rain
Babe, seems like everything is doing good now between you and the boy and you don't wanna jinx it by talking about it, so i will do so too :) all the best but you do know it's going to be a rocky relationship. in which ever way, persevere k >.<
Having more time in hand makes me wanna do more things. i have the urge to take up jap lessons, so anyone interested in joining me? i also have the urge to do archery. not too sure why. but the possibility of me being influenced by mangas and animes for that is absolutely high. you know cool those characters play the archery. omg. they look so man can....omg. why didnt i do archery in the past. argh, nevermind :) at least i did rock climbing before. cheers.
Just packed my room today and i found a ring that pilot gave to me long ago. somehow i started thinking back to those time we spent together. as usual, i really wonder how would it be like if i really were to get together with him. at the same time, i tried to recall why did i push him away back then. check up on facebook but it seems like he's not been active lately so the pictures are still the same as i last viewed several months back. you know how sometimes, it just got you thinking. i wonder if back then, if he would really persevered and stayed on, would i hand my heart to him fully? well, there's a possibility that may happen. afterall, he's courting me all the way back to when we were in secondary school. it has been 10 years since then. time flies.
you know how i used to ponder why would he be so insistent on our relationship. i'm always wondering if he really loves me for real and if it is really that case, how could he just left after all those that he had promised me. although we never really started, it is true that he indeed has given me his promises. where are they now? so talk is really cheap isn't it? i dont want to talk about him. i just feel so tired since it has always been the same old thing over and over again. and as i talked about pilot, woodblock would surface for some very strange reasons god knows why.
woodblock was my ideal man but he didnt have that feelings for me despite i thought he did. apparently i made a mistake but he was really thoughtful and thus sweet in his very own ways. all his little gestures can make me smile even now. it seems that what he did and what happened still remains so vivid and it was really funny when i think back. i regretted to taking the chance to ask at the night. he is still me ideal man though and after a long consideration, i have decided to use him as my benchmark later for any guys who happens to appear in my life.
after typing so much. i'm starting to miss woodblock a bit :)
Having more time in hand makes me wanna do more things. i have the urge to take up jap lessons, so anyone interested in joining me? i also have the urge to do archery. not too sure why. but the possibility of me being influenced by mangas and animes for that is absolutely high. you know cool those characters play the archery. omg. they look so man can....omg. why didnt i do archery in the past. argh, nevermind :) at least i did rock climbing before. cheers.
Just packed my room today and i found a ring that pilot gave to me long ago. somehow i started thinking back to those time we spent together. as usual, i really wonder how would it be like if i really were to get together with him. at the same time, i tried to recall why did i push him away back then. check up on facebook but it seems like he's not been active lately so the pictures are still the same as i last viewed several months back. you know how sometimes, it just got you thinking. i wonder if back then, if he would really persevered and stayed on, would i hand my heart to him fully? well, there's a possibility that may happen. afterall, he's courting me all the way back to when we were in secondary school. it has been 10 years since then. time flies.
you know how i used to ponder why would he be so insistent on our relationship. i'm always wondering if he really loves me for real and if it is really that case, how could he just left after all those that he had promised me. although we never really started, it is true that he indeed has given me his promises. where are they now? so talk is really cheap isn't it? i dont want to talk about him. i just feel so tired since it has always been the same old thing over and over again. and as i talked about pilot, woodblock would surface for some very strange reasons god knows why.
woodblock was my ideal man but he didnt have that feelings for me despite i thought he did. apparently i made a mistake but he was really thoughtful and thus sweet in his very own ways. all his little gestures can make me smile even now. it seems that what he did and what happened still remains so vivid and it was really funny when i think back. i regretted to taking the chance to ask at the night. he is still me ideal man though and after a long consideration, i have decided to use him as my benchmark later for any guys who happens to appear in my life.
after typing so much. i'm starting to miss woodblock a bit :)
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Life Still Goes On
Read your blog and somehow it just got me thinking again. and as u can see, i may not be able to be there for you when u really do need me so here i am, once again, posting my thoughts so that it would be able to set u thinking like how your posts set mine :)
Babe, life is not always blissful like those u see in FAIRYTALES (it's not WaltDisney's fault) and sometimes we just have to learn how to deal with it. Experience is not what happens to a you but it is what you do with what happens to you that you gain those experiences. I know your shittiest moments of your life and you've been through that. Friends only happens to be in your way when you're falling and though we had our arguments and disagreements, you know deep down we will always be there to catch your fall :)
It's alright to make wrong decisions in life. Everyone does as long as it is not too sinful that it is irreversible. things still move on and life still goes on. Not everyone found their perfect love on first attempt and trust me enough, those "happily ever after" couples out there, they have been through their ups and downs in their relationship but the main difference between us and them is that they managed to get through and we didn't. But it's alright. that's part and parcel of our life and we learn and grow from it. It's really alright babe, don't be so hard on yourself :)
it's not wrong to want attention from the boy u loved so deeply. who doesn't? and i came upon this friend's fb status that says "don't believe him coming back saying that he misses you so badly and stuff, remember, he didnt' chooose you" and you know, this got me thinking again (although for a different reason) but somehow, that phrase is so true. i can't deny that. babe, did he really choose you over her?
I understand that she has formed a chapter in his life and that is not possible to erase it off. you knew that and you accept it all. you're childish; that's not new. everyone around you knows that. but think about it, if the both of you can't get through this ordeal, it just shows how much love both of you have put into this relationship. It is not a matter of who loves who more, because that can never be measured distinctively on a scale.
I told you before, you need to take caution when it comes to love and you said it yourself that no one is there to protect your own heart. i know it is not easy to be in a relationship with someone. it takes two person of two different personality to be together. try it out any math equation and you know there won't be any answers to that. It takes more than what you think to get this relationship going, dear. If you're childish, then you just have to be more mature. Believe me, i know how much you've matured from the day you left to Aussie till i saw you last November and i told you that its not enough but there's room for improvement. and true enough, maturity doesn't comes overnight but over the years. Babe, if you have already done you part in this relationship and nothing seems to work, life would be much easier to move on. don't worry, you didnt lose the game. don't let your pride gets in your way.
This whole shit thing is getting a toll on you. probably its telling you to start look at things from a different perspective. see things from different angle. Babe, i'm not there with you in Aussie so i can't tell if what the boy is doing is for real or not. you have to learn to judge them youself. you know how acute your sixth senses are so don't doubt them. look before you leap. that's your main weak point. you hand over your heart too soon. i don't want you to be like me, because at this point of my life, i simply just lose faith in love. i don't believe in that now and i have found other goals in my life to pursue for. but babe, you still have faith in them don't you? give it a last chance and determine for youself what's best. only you know what you want best and you know yourself better than anyone out there does.
trust yourself dear. believe in your inner voice. have faith in it. don't deny yourself anymore. take the first step to listen to what your heart has to say and stay with it till the end. at least you know you've tried and so you would have come to an easy term in accepting what ever outcome it may be. At this point, there really isn't a right or wrong answer.
follow your heart because only from your heart you get the most honest answer.
Babe, life is not always blissful like those u see in FAIRYTALES (it's not WaltDisney's fault) and sometimes we just have to learn how to deal with it. Experience is not what happens to a you but it is what you do with what happens to you that you gain those experiences. I know your shittiest moments of your life and you've been through that. Friends only happens to be in your way when you're falling and though we had our arguments and disagreements, you know deep down we will always be there to catch your fall :)
It's alright to make wrong decisions in life. Everyone does as long as it is not too sinful that it is irreversible. things still move on and life still goes on. Not everyone found their perfect love on first attempt and trust me enough, those "happily ever after" couples out there, they have been through their ups and downs in their relationship but the main difference between us and them is that they managed to get through and we didn't. But it's alright. that's part and parcel of our life and we learn and grow from it. It's really alright babe, don't be so hard on yourself :)
it's not wrong to want attention from the boy u loved so deeply. who doesn't? and i came upon this friend's fb status that says "don't believe him coming back saying that he misses you so badly and stuff, remember, he didnt' chooose you" and you know, this got me thinking again (although for a different reason) but somehow, that phrase is so true. i can't deny that. babe, did he really choose you over her?
I understand that she has formed a chapter in his life and that is not possible to erase it off. you knew that and you accept it all. you're childish; that's not new. everyone around you knows that. but think about it, if the both of you can't get through this ordeal, it just shows how much love both of you have put into this relationship. It is not a matter of who loves who more, because that can never be measured distinctively on a scale.
I told you before, you need to take caution when it comes to love and you said it yourself that no one is there to protect your own heart. i know it is not easy to be in a relationship with someone. it takes two person of two different personality to be together. try it out any math equation and you know there won't be any answers to that. It takes more than what you think to get this relationship going, dear. If you're childish, then you just have to be more mature. Believe me, i know how much you've matured from the day you left to Aussie till i saw you last November and i told you that its not enough but there's room for improvement. and true enough, maturity doesn't comes overnight but over the years. Babe, if you have already done you part in this relationship and nothing seems to work, life would be much easier to move on. don't worry, you didnt lose the game. don't let your pride gets in your way.
This whole shit thing is getting a toll on you. probably its telling you to start look at things from a different perspective. see things from different angle. Babe, i'm not there with you in Aussie so i can't tell if what the boy is doing is for real or not. you have to learn to judge them youself. you know how acute your sixth senses are so don't doubt them. look before you leap. that's your main weak point. you hand over your heart too soon. i don't want you to be like me, because at this point of my life, i simply just lose faith in love. i don't believe in that now and i have found other goals in my life to pursue for. but babe, you still have faith in them don't you? give it a last chance and determine for youself what's best. only you know what you want best and you know yourself better than anyone out there does.
trust yourself dear. believe in your inner voice. have faith in it. don't deny yourself anymore. take the first step to listen to what your heart has to say and stay with it till the end. at least you know you've tried and so you would have come to an easy term in accepting what ever outcome it may be. At this point, there really isn't a right or wrong answer.
follow your heart because only from your heart you get the most honest answer.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Whatever That Is Left
2 papers down and 2 more to go...omg, i'm dreading the days till my last paper and i really really wanna to just hurry up and get it over and done with! I HAD ENOUGH OF BOOKS....and guess what i just realised that i only read twilight until book 2....i wanna continue with my edward!!!! i'm comtemplating whether should i buy that book, but u know it's not very smart of me to invest in that coz it's damn ex. probably i'll just put that as one of my "wish list" to have to collect the 4 books. i really think that it's a great series...so any kind hearted souls out there is willing to buy the twilight series for me?!?!?!?!
anyway, back to question. so why am i here blogging when i have a paper on tuesday and another on thursday? the answer is simple. I'm sick of studying. argh, u know what JUST SCREW IT...but but but, i need my degree -.- alright, back to square one...i need to study.
and you know , it's not nice to last min hug the buddha leg because u don't know it if would work and most of the time the results will tell u that u're plain lucky to have SCRAPE through...i know and by the way, did i spell that correctly?! er, i hope i did. i have been making TOO MANY mistakes lately and i really really don't wanna make any more STUPID mistakes...
oh boy....this is giving me hell lot of stress and i need my massage and facial...and i want my FUN! play play play..ice skating with the girls again on the 31st!!!!!!! YEA!!!!!! and dun worry steffi, when you're back i'll make sure that i'll get ah foo and ah sim to go ice skating with us :) and i suddenly wanna go watch movie so steffi, pls hurry and come back so we could go out for movies soon!!!! i need to wait till november -.- u sure have the guts to make me wait so long...but what to do...i'm used to it already. what's worst than u not picking up your phone?! anyway, i seem to have this habit these days tooo...ah foo and ah sim is complaining about me not answering my phone..but u see, my phone is er....a bit tooo high tech so yea.... :) smiles.
and i think i'd better get back to my books....
it's calling out for me...
27th MAY. I'M WAITING. it would be the pivoting point!!!!!!
anyway, back to question. so why am i here blogging when i have a paper on tuesday and another on thursday? the answer is simple. I'm sick of studying. argh, u know what JUST SCREW IT...but but but, i need my degree -.- alright, back to square one...i need to study.
and you know , it's not nice to last min hug the buddha leg because u don't know it if would work and most of the time the results will tell u that u're plain lucky to have SCRAPE through...i know and by the way, did i spell that correctly?! er, i hope i did. i have been making TOO MANY mistakes lately and i really really don't wanna make any more STUPID mistakes...
oh boy....this is giving me hell lot of stress and i need my massage and facial...and i want my FUN! play play play..ice skating with the girls again on the 31st!!!!!!! YEA!!!!!! and dun worry steffi, when you're back i'll make sure that i'll get ah foo and ah sim to go ice skating with us :) and i suddenly wanna go watch movie so steffi, pls hurry and come back so we could go out for movies soon!!!! i need to wait till november -.- u sure have the guts to make me wait so long...but what to do...i'm used to it already. what's worst than u not picking up your phone?! anyway, i seem to have this habit these days tooo...ah foo and ah sim is complaining about me not answering my phone..but u see, my phone is er....a bit tooo high tech so yea.... :) smiles.
and i think i'd better get back to my books....
it's calling out for me...
27th MAY. I'M WAITING. it would be the pivoting point!!!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)